"Ohhhhh nooooo"

Me: So, I’ve got some news!
Him: You aren’t leaving are you?
Me: Nope! But I am pregnant.
Him: What?! Oh my. Ohhhhh myyyyy…..
Me: (laughing) yep!
Him: Ohhhhh nooooooo!
Me: What?! What’s wrong?
Him: Well, (clears throat) I mean…..what’s next?
Me: Well, I guess we have a baby!

That was my favorite reaction to the news thus far. I still chuckle about it! As I have begun to tell people at work, you can tell they are DYING to ask, when’s the wedding? But no one will! And if they don’t have the kahunas to ask…then they won’t get my response on the subject.

Other breaking of the news went great. I told 3 of my 8 bosses this week. The Chairman, a Commissioner and the County Manager. All of them reacted in much of the same way. Huge smiles, stories of their own children, plenty of congratulations, and even offers of putting a crib in the meeting room. The Chairman was left speechless and finally said “I feel like my 17 year old little girl just told me she was pregnant!” He ended the convo with “whatever you do, don’t miss a day. Bring the baby to work.” I said “I don’t know, there may be a couple days where I am not here” thinking it has to get into this world somehow!

The more people I tell, the more real it gets! After hearing the heartbeat, everything became real and sharing the news became exciting, often times fun, and not anxiety producing like in the beginning. I’m with JP, I’m ready for “her” to be here now! But am trying to take it each day at a time, enjoy being in regular clothes for a little while longer and looking forward to each step. But I still can’t help counting down the days until my next appointment when we can hear that beautiful sound again.

I had an eye opening moment this week. The doctor asked about my diet and encouraged more protein. So I have gotten up each morning 10 minutes earlier to make an old favorite…an egg, cheese and ham in a tortilla wrap. The second morning while I was folding the wrap in aluminum foil to take to work, it hit me. Mom used to do this for us all the time (with the addition of fresh herbs cut that morning from the garden). Even into high school. HIGH SCHOOL! In high school I should have been making my own wrap! But between her getting ready for work and getting everyone out of the door on time, she took time to make sure we had a nutritious breakfast. I found myself wondering, am I ready to do that? Am I ready to shorten my “me” time in the morning (and every other part of the day) to make a wrap every day for someone else? But then I know once I lay eyes on that tiny bundle of love, giving the world to him/her will not feel like enough. And then I’m ready to have the baby here with me now. Besides….the baby won’t be quite ready for wraps in the beginning anyways ;)

My favorite part of the day has been going home to reenact the reactions of the day for JP. We giggle about them and always find ourselves in a much deeper conversation about details of life once the baby is here. I have begun to wonder, what did we even talk about before all of this?

We’ve recently begun a spinning class. I have gotten many reactions from this. "Ohhh you shouldn’t do that." And "Oh that’s good because you can work out as hard or easy as you want!" JP has been reading in some of the many books we have been given and apparently read a passage regarding my heart rate and the need to keep it under a certain number. Last night as the instructor yells “SPRINT” I look up in the mirrored wall to see JP glaring at me. I look over and he points to his chest and then to the floor as if to sign “keep that heart rate down!” It’s times like these, and even sometimes just as I stand beside him doing dishes at the end of the night, I think how lucky I am to have such a thoughtful, sensitive and caring person to share a child with. That man is my B.D.

And I find it isn't in spinning class, or right before I tell someone the news, but times like those when I struggle to keep my heart rate down...